alexpgp | Chess ... The three nerds.

I'm not completely sure, but I believe that Ira Guterman, André Gordon, and I became fast friends somewhere around the sixth grade. Thinking back, I recall that Ira played a clarinet in music class, while I sat on the other side of the room, the only baritone horn player in the crowd.

My memories of our escapades are dim. I know we often ate lunch together and discussed the fine points of the popular television shows of the day. Ira and I were not very athletic and invariably were the last two players to be chosen for any game of ball (assuming we'd be chosen at all), while André was of a more delicate build, more suited to watching a ball game than being in one.

It turned out all three of us developed an interest in chess at about the same time.

And the astounding part of it was this: for the longest time, I lost each and every game to Ira, who in turn lost each and every game to André, who in turn lost each and every game to me.

Go figure.

Our family moved out of Queens two years later and I lost track of both chums. I think they came to visit me once while I was at college, but the contact was temporary. I remember playing one last game against Ira, which I won (finally!).

Eventually, I came to understand - or at least believe - that the key to the riddle lay not solely in objective factors, such as skill at chess, but had to also take account of a very important subjective factor: one's state of mind when facing an opponent. I believe that in junior high, all three of us developed an "expectation" of what we could and could not achieve over the chessboard when playing the other two members of our little group, and that any chess skill took a back seat to that.

When I sat down across from Ira for that last game, my confidence was at an all-time high (I'd successfully hustled a little chess in the Village and at the university, for cigarette money). I "knew" I could beat him, so I did.

And now, it's really time to go to bed.

Cheers...